…Even more than we previously thought.

“New research by University of Iowa management experts demonstrated just how easily decision  makers are swayed during the selection process. The researchers analyzed interaction dynamics during job interviews to see which factors had the greatest influence on the hiring decision. To their surprise, they found that a job applicant’s handshake made a world of difference.

A firm handshake, in fact was more important than agreeableness, conscientiousness or emotional  stability. The recipe for a good handshakem the reachers found, is simple: a sturdy grip, solid eye contact and a hearty vertical hand movement….The interviewers didn’t consciously realize they were making an important decision  based on a handshake: irrelevant factors simply creep into our judgment of others”

Ori Brafman and Rom Brafman in “Sway: The Irresistible Pull of Irrational Behavior”

First — why would you want to?

Business guru Alan Weiss gives a dramatic example: if you were told the number of deaths caused by smoking every year, would you remember that exact figure three months from now? Probably not. But what if you were told that this figure was equal to three fully loaded Boeing 747 planes crashing into the earth every day for a year, with no survivors? Quite a bit more memorable, eh?

The brain’s language is images, pictures, stories– the more dramatic, the more memorable. One of my coaching clients was an executive in a Big Four firm, who needed to impress upon his team the importance of telling their clients about a new regulation which could gravely impact their business.

Rather than telling his team “you really need to tell our clients about FASB 151″, we phrased it as “not telling your client about FASB 151 would be like letting them walk into a lion’s den, armed with nothing but a toothpick–and blindfolded.”

… It’s how smart you make them feel.

Remember the Pavlovian reflex? People will associate to you whatever feelings you evoke in them on a consistent basis. And people like feeling good about themselves– so if you make them feel they’re brilliant, they’ll very much want to be around you.

Don’t try to impress them– let them impress you, and they will love you for it.